22nd of September. I’ve had better days. Occasionally you get a 16 hour period where you stumble upon whatever the collective noun is for .... lots of crap news:
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Imaginary blog video of a newscast from 22.9.2010
Announcer
(patronising, slightly cynical, mid atlantic tone)
“And now on Channel Blanche its the Michael O’Clock News where events of little consequence are reported over-dramatically”:...
[Cue dramatic, drum-based music combined with cool visual graphics of sheep] ...
DONG (this represents a bell chime and not a rude word)....
[cut to serious man with a serious hairstyle, and an even more serious voice] ....
Newsreader with the Hair
(impressively theatrical)
“Michael ... [coughs whilst blurting the word Plonker] ... said to be devastated after been given notice on his grazing” ... [cut to picture of Michael making a funny face] ....
DONG ....
[you don’t want to know the rest - its irrelevant, slightly dull and caravan related]
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I think that had potential but didn’t fulfill (or even half-fill) it. Anyway, bottom line is I have to be off all the grass I have ... every last blade ... by next Spring. Not because I am a cad or a bounder (... this time, at least) but just because the landlord wants to farm it himself now. His consultant has been nagging him that he needs to concentrate more on his farming operation .... his consultant is some “plonker” called Michael Blanche! He’s been really good to me, he’s given me five years and I have proceeded to build a flock of an ok size and feather my warm and cozy comfort zone with super-soft downy material.
So now I need to go round Land Agent’s ... buy a cap and make sure I doff it ... and try to understand that my sheep flock isn’t of any concern or importance to anyone else other than me. I need to make some phone calls, introduce myself, try and find persuasive chat from somewhere and charm pants off people. Its uncomfortable though. I’ve been on places where I was a couple of pounds lighter in the flesh department between arriving and leaving. I’ve been on places where the feudal system is stronger now than it was in the days of William of Orange. I’ve been on places where my tongue was bitten every day and I spoke with a lisp for months afterwards. Renting land is just business; my sheep are just passion. Its not a good mix - when practicality meets passion there is usually only one winner.
Being given notice may be the best or the worst thing to happen. I could get more ground, more control, more security. Yet there is the very credible possibility of not finding grass at all; finding grass but not at a price I can make a worthwhile profit; or finding too little grass. I might get a 6 month let and have to go through the process all over again and bi-annually thereafter thus maintaining a constant state of desparation. I may have to sell all the sheep or a large proportion of them .... and thus sell the dream to the highest bidder in a market place full of wide awake people.
This position represents a defining paradox in my study ... I have to take sides in my thinking at some point and support one attitude or another: is it the system’s fault I find it really difficult to get land .... or, is it mine? I’ve noticed that since returning from Australia and New Zealand where every success and failure was attributed to the individual (and any other reasoning is blatant whinging), that I’ve been sucked back in to this British culture of blaming the system. Land is incredibly difficult to obtain for a price that you are able to grow a business without subsidy. Control is minimal. Length of term is pitiful. You can be dropped on a whim. It causes frustration and I understand where this culture has come from ... its not illogical. But first generation farming is all in the struggle. Struggle is good because it makes you better. Getting into farming should be hard .... but it also needs to be possible. That’s the fine line.
Obviously if I fail - its the system’s fault ... if I succeed - its all down to me! Place your bets please, ladies and gentlemen, place your bets.
2 comments:
Go on Michael cash in and sell those sheep while the price is good. Then at least you will have the money for the rent when you find that dream farm.
I've placed my bet---but i had trouble finding a bookie with decent odds!
Talked to one of my landlords today, he thought the notion of a farming ladder was laughable, the only way to do it was as he did it, making money elsewhere before investing it in land. The only reason to invest in land (he says) is that it is safe and in short supply and has an excellent long term return profile---
Thought that would make you feel better!
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